The ongoing story of the Chuckster ([info]naughtomaton) wrote,
@ 2007-03-02 08:16:00
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Current location:34 56' 32.92" -81 02' 04.41"

Grocery Shopping
A friend recently posted about how he sometimes claims to be a senior citizen at the self-check-out-terminals (SCOT, did anyone already know that acronym?) terminals at his local grocery store. It reminded me of something I did/said/channeled recently, so I thought I'd relate it here and see if anyone has any thoughts.

While popping into the grocery store last week I parked in one of the "mothers with children" spaces. You know they have the shopping cart with mom pushing it and a child sitting in the cart.

When I came back with my groceries this woman was towing two of her children by my car, as I loaded it up and she said "Hey, do you know that you're parked in a space for mothers with children?"

I looked up saw the sign and without thinking I said "Do you have any idea what percentage of mothers in the U.S. are morbidly obese?" a pause in which it's hard to tell which of us was more horrified, though I'm pretty sure I didn't look any different from my usual goofy smiling self. Somehow I thought what might fix it was to follow up with an explanatory "Me neither, I just didn't notice the sign."

She was staring at me flabbergasted, and her children were just kind of standing there, so I got in the Wrangler and headed out.

Was I terrible? Was I funny? Is this the price I pay for those improv lessons at Dad's Garage so many years ago?


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[info]steakums
2007-03-02 02:22 pm UTC (link)
I think it's pretty funny - but I wasn't lugging my two kids and a cart full of groceries past your car at the time. :-)

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[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-02 02:27 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, that's kind of how I felt. Funny, but...

It has to be mentioned that both her kids, though young, were walking.

And all of them needed more exercise.

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[info]steakums
2007-03-02 02:47 pm UTC (link)
In that case, you did a public service.

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[info]travellight
2007-03-02 02:45 pm UTC (link)
I think it's funny. But I don't have children to lug. I might have said, "Oh, sorry. The spots for single people with other things to do were full."

You made 'em, you tote 'em.

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[info]steakums
2007-03-02 02:46 pm UTC (link)
Here, here, sister.

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[info]travellight
2007-03-02 02:52 pm UTC (link)
I'm channeling a friend of a friend who has declared that there aren't many benefits of being single, and the one good one is that you're practically expected to be selfish.

Which is not to say I wouldn't park in the spot if I wanted to, but I don't usually have to, because of the Law of Good Sex or Parking Karma.

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[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-02 03:02 pm UTC (link)
And how is this law phrased?

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[info]travellight
2007-03-02 06:08 pm UTC (link)
A person may have either Good Parking Karma or Good Sex Karma, but never both within a 72-hour period. Passing up a good parking spot will not bring Good Sex Karma, nor will passing up sex bring Good Parking Karma. Good Parking Karma and Good Sex Karma are arbitrarily issued by the cosmos and must be taken when given, lest the opportunity for either be lost.

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[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-02 07:43 pm UTC (link)
Interesting.

I almost never drive anymore since I work at home. That means I almost always have a good parking space.

The cosmos is cruel.

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[info]travellight
2007-03-03 04:21 am UTC (link)
Yeah, the cosmos can be a main bitch.

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[info]friendofjack
2007-03-02 03:41 pm UTC (link)
I think it's funny.

I didn't even know that mothers with children got special parking spaces. I've seen the "expectant mothers" signs. I've never seen "mothers with children" signs.

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[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-02 07:45 pm UTC (link)
Perhaps is a South Carolina thing. I can't remember if I saw it in Georgia or not.

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[info]electricrocket
2007-03-02 05:52 pm UTC (link)
It's like a piece of performance art.

Wait... what about fathers with children? We go to the grocery store, too.

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[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-02 07:06 pm UTC (link)
I've thought about that too.

And how about people who aren't handicapped, but just feel bad that day?

Or kids with wheelie shoes? They're less likely to get hit by a car if the distance they travel in the parking lot is shorter.

People with bald heads who are perfectly healthy? Oh that's me. I usually park at the far end, just because I get stuck behind other people less that way.

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[info]travellight
2007-03-03 04:20 am UTC (link)
Mothers with children should have their own separate grocery stores.

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Muthers...
[info]rhienzi
2007-03-07 12:17 pm UTC (link)
Well, I feel like I've just done 50 reps of 25 crunches from laughing so hard so my vote is that you were funny. Thanks for not sweeping the elephant under the rug.

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Re: Muthers...
[info]naughtomaton
2007-03-07 12:26 pm UTC (link)
You know me, I've never been able to keep my mouth shut.

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Re: Muthers...
[info]rhienzi
2007-03-07 03:12 pm UTC (link)
Not necessesarily a bad thing though. I copied and sent it to L.G. along with the pics of the babies. Hope you don't mind. She'll get a kick out of it.

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